Match Reports
30/04/09
Sussex 30-96 Men's 4th XI
4s Season Round-up 2008-09
Well after the disappointment of going down last season we have the unbridled joy of going straight back up as unbeaten champions and Sussex Cup Winners. With only two draws it is a great achievement to all those that played. There have been a great many excellent displays this season but special congratulations should be given to Smithy and Davros (28 goals) who were consistently outstanding. Bondy, Dan S and Perry proved their quality time and time again. New boys Wrighty and The Dobinator also proved their worth to the team. Add to that Benson and JC who came in and did great jobs when needed. Thanks also to the guest stars, of which there are too many to mention.
The satisfaction can be found in the stats though, won 20 drawn 2 lost 0 goals for 126 goals against 30 (GD +96 (so close to 100!)).
Personal Highlights
Strops - Wappy (with only two appearances) and Andy C (playing once in the game of legends) but both were able to make up for it with sizeable and memorable strops. 'Oh come on!' and the Gap Band slap will live long in my memory.
Goals - Hatfuls for Davros and capfuls for Dobson and Benson
Anger - Crowborough skipper, oh dear oh dear! Even his own players hated him.
Lectures - Steve Mooney's lecture at the smallest person on the park in our first game. (He rightly predicted a good season for us though.)
Blood - Wrighty cutting his eye and then asking (as he lay on the floor) if he looked hard. No, you didn�t.
Rants - Me losing it at half time during a rubbish draw. Calm down!
Injuries - JC taking out the bandana wearing skipper of Horsham with a shot to the toe, playing on and scoring. Hilarious!
Goals part 2 - Important personal achievements. Ready 1 from open play, Dermot 1 since puberty.
Communication breakdown - Yann talking the umpire out of awarding Davros a drag flicked short corner effort.
Lessons in skill -
- Phil O (on pitch) using the same method time and time again to get passed a wily old defender. The defender won every time.
- Footspa scuffing up a reverse stick effort on goal. Never again!
- Dobson missing a p.flick for a hat-trick.
- Jolyon annoying Littlehampton by getting in the way.
- Wrighty controlling an aerial ball with his testicles.
- Two words, Dan Wu. Nuff said.
- The right slip at short corners! So Annoying!
- Ready and Mullens playing like Baron and Flash on the oscillating platform in Flash Gordon, i.e. always falling over!
Underwear - Dobson's pants, please never again.
Self grandiosing - Dobson for giving himself MOM. No sir, that just won't do sir!
Organisation - Leaving for an away game forgetting Chris Perry, ooops!
Mileage - The pedometer challenge that never happened, the result was never in question though. Everyone knows Bondy is a true circle to circle, midfield workhorse.
Decent examples of skill -
- Smithy's tackling. Genius. As Ready pointed out, 'he reminds me of a young me.' (!!!)
- Ready's tackling, not always fair but always important, i.e. excitingly left to the last minute.
- Vanilla Ice saving us against the 5s.
- Me actually earning a clean sheet v Penguins!
- Awesome ten men victory v Littlehampton.
- Cameron's appreciation of a Smithy aerial pass, 'oooo that's nice!'
- Yann.
Bums - Bondy's series of toilet trips caused by currys, Yann's inabaility to find a serviceable toilet, thanks largely to Laurie. JC being housebound on the morning of a game.
Medical Moments - Bondy's suggestion to alleviate JC's injured hamstring. It would never have worked.
The 5s rematch - Handbags and ball-bags (see Wrighty's example of ball control above).
Navigation - Wrighty getting lost between Hove and Preston Park.
Thanks: All those have umpired for us and team mates that have stepped up and umpired others, especially Tosh and The Dobinator for doing more than their fair share. Thanks to Ready, JC and Davros for vice-captaincy assistance when needed. And of course thanks to Matt and Thompo for tireless behind the scenes work to get enough players out on a Saturday.
Brooksy